More opportunity, less faith !!

It is five years, since the last time WE put in place a bunch of people to make our nation look better. I have never exercised my choice and ditto for this time.

However, I did someting with season's flavour and went in search of the MAN. Yes, he is the MAN. The man, whose name was used in temple rhetoric by a certain political outfit; the political outfit that got catapulted to the dizzying heights of political fame and power riding high on this MAN.

He is none other than R&M, or R&MA for the convent bred and anglophiles. The epitome of manhood, the righteous, the spiritual, the one and all. The man whose heroic tales have been a part of each one's growing up. The man, whose bow, arrow, wife, demonic opponent and brother have been parts of our everyday life.
After spending 2 days in the meandering courses of my cerebral neverland, I found him.

Simple and low was he, sitting in a corner.

I said, 'Hi sir'.

No response and I repeated my greeting.

This time the silence was even harder.

I didn't like it, but spent some time observing him.

It seemed as if he was feeling cast away, left out or rather subdued.
He was upset, if not angry and quite pensive.

I couldn't resist and asked, 'What's the matter with you?'

Suddenly he got up and spoke aloud, 'What's the matter? Why don't you go and ask this to those manipulators?'
'I am nothing for them now?', he continued.

I could make some sense of the sudden angst showing up.

And, before I could speak further, he walked off.

Those strong words left a deep impression on me and made me ponder for some time.
I decided to log on to a popular news portal to read the book of promises published by this political outfit.I was taken aback to see the top priorities being anything but the MAN or the long promised shelter for him. However, the MAN and his promised shelter did have a place in the book of promises. A fleeting mention here, a vague remark there.

I was deeply saddened and dismayed by this political outfit's change of colour. For me, it is an unabashed display of opportunity politics; in some sense, quite abominable.

The one issue which bestowed this outfit with a national status has been dropped off like a pack of cards. Dropping this has a different meaning altogether.

It is a reflection of the values and ethos of the modern day politicos.

My deep sadness does not stem from the fact that the promised shelter or its beneficiary does not find any favour with this political outfit; not because, I am one from the same clan.

Then it struck me that why would R&M want his shelter and a certain status. I rushed back to the cerebral neverland to get my answer.

I met him again and pounced on him with my questions. I was slightly angry and raring to have a go at our MAN.

'Why do you want a temple in your name? Don't you realise the stigma around it; the riot, the bloodshed, the polarisation!'

He smiled at me and said, 'Revisit carefully, what I then said and then ask me these silly questions.'

‘I will do that, but why did you say that – I am nothing for them now. This means you want a certain special status?’ I asked.

‘How did you come to that conclusion? I was feeling left out; that is true, but me wanting a status is a figment of your imagination. ‘, R&M replied.

He continued, ‘Now listen carefully. I am but a mere mode, say a pipe, to keep a steady flow values and ethos to you. I do not have a desire for a temple; the whole world, the universe, the skies are my shelter. I am just like you. You make me sound big and then complain in trying times. I was feeling low because these politicos have tried to squeeze this pipe, if not cutting it. I never asked them for a temple; nor was I on cloud nine when they ran riot for it. I was happy with everyone, but sad with them, because they do not value anything, but power. Under the garb of alliances, they play with sentiments.’

I kept looking at him speechless, cursing myself for jumping to conclusions.

He smiled again and said, ‘The reason behind saying – I mean nothing for them, was my worry for those naïve people under their influence. For years, these innocent people believed in the glib talk of these politicos. My name was used to win over people, so I need to keep the faith alive. Now, the name has dropped down, which means people are being taken for granted. They will realise it soon and hit back, but with a lot of pain and lost years behind them. These people like me as a god, so be it. Some like me as a mythological hero, and some for values associated with my tales. I need to respect and continue their faith. It pained me when people were led to ransack others’ belief and monuments. I had to give them time to realise their own follies.’

I got the message and came back to reality waving good-bye to him. An atheist had got some meaningful discourse on faith.

It is right to keep faith alive, definitely not by building temples. It is quite ironical that the faith and perseverance of R&M is totally absent in his so called advocates. R& M spent 13 years in exile, and these hawks could not test their perseverance in sticking to their ideology for even 6 years. The lust for power made them change radically, putting the faith of millions on the backseat.

To sum it up, a temple or a god is not the issue, it is the faith in values and ethos associated with the godly icons that matter. To change one’s ideology like handkerchiefs, is not respecting these icons. To mobilise forces by raking up silly issues is also not faith. I am sure people will realise, how each one has been misled and their faith was never given the right direction. WE will also realise that the political chefs have more of opportunity and less of faith in their kitchens.

Give me red .....

Gulaal made it 3 in a month for me from the Anurag Kashyap drama factory.
Needless to mention that, it added to my delight of watching creatvely crafted cinematic work.

However, one common thread of his movies has stuck with me.

His fascination for the colour RED !!
In his latest flick, characters have red gulaal on their faces.
In DEV D, RED fills the background in the movie, the posters, the trailers, et al.
Ditto for Black Friday and No Smoking.

What does this bright RED signify? What does he want to convey?

Probably, the angst of the central charcters, or their violent pangs.
Quite a logical conclusion, given the background of the movies.

I feel it is more than the angst or the pangs and extends beyond the background.
I feel it is the reflection of one's mind. A divided, disturbed mind or a revolutionary, bright mind. I am quite confused with the right choice.

The confusion stems from the multiple connotations that this bright RED has.

It can mean fire, or revolution, or passion, or sin, or a warning and the list continues.

His movies are a bit of everything RED means or can mean.
His characters are a bit sinful, given to vices like ganjaa. They are passioante and bright. They are different from the usual, making them in essence revolutionary.
Most of them are a warning beacuse, in a way they convey the human fallacies.
More often than not, one would also attribute a morbid aspect to this colour, failing to realise nothing more than this signifies LIFE.

What intrigues me most is they are unsettling by nature and yet very appealing.
They leave a lasting impression on you and make you think.

In fact, the ubiquitous RED of Mr. Kashyap, is a leading indicator of the versatile and varied nature of his movie making. This choice of this multidimensional colour speaks volumes of the efficacy and the implicit meaning of this brilliant movie-making style, a tuly intellectual one.

After constant mulling over this colour and its choice, I have only one thing to tell this brilliant movie master, 'Give me more, give me RED'.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
p.s. Comments invited.

Show me your colour.

Big B not to celebrate HOLI this year!
Read a news item in a portal, I visit regularly.
Why did my eye catch this? Coz it had a certain BIG name, or there was a NO to colours.

I like reading about this BIG name, but it was the NOT that popped a question.
Well, the obvious one, i.e., WHY??

I delved deep in finding out why someone known for a BIG YES to colours every year has given a BIG NO to it.
I got my answer. The NO to colours comes as a mark of respect to the victims of the horrific 26/11 event. Awesome, I said and continued with my preparation to leave for work.

While driving to work, a debate sparked off in a remote corner of my head.
A debate of the 'to be or not to be' variety.

The reason for keeping it 'black and white' on Holi day was well understood.

However, I pushed myself into finding out the reasons for celebrating Holi as a mark of respect to the lives lost, the heroes and the bereaved families left behind.

To give colours a skip, adds to the despondant and the morose imprints left behind.
In fact, we should stand up together and paint the town red, and ensure we get the affected to have a colourful day.
Our collective human spirit should propel us to show our true colours as a mark of respect to the spirit of our nation.
A nation that has brushed off the wounds and taken the deep scars in her stride. A nation that will show its true colour by defying attempts to curtail our celebration of life.
We should say a BIG YES to colurs for Mumbai.
The magical city, still recuperating from the illness inflicted on 26/11, did not change to black and white. It has returned to the resplendent colours post the horror.

I do not intend to negate someone's stance. I just want to advocate that giving colours a miss this Holi, is not our true colour.
The resilient human spirit should send out a message to the perpetrators of any violence by showing its true colour.
Saying YES to colours depsite 26/11 makes the celebration of life grandiose.

We should get up today and ask the one another, 'Show me your colour'.

Albert A-live !!!

A young man, tall of frame, rushed through the bushes and trees. Hands in his overcoat, sporting a designer French hat, he rushed out of sight. Walking through the misty night, with a gun in his hands, he looked as dashing and fearless as Amitabh Bachchan in the movie 'Don'.



Suddenly, a gunshot followed. The scary silence of the cold winter night was shattered by the sound of the gunshot, at the unearthly time of 2 hours post mid night. I was expecting a flutter or two between the bushes and our star would emerge running. I waited like a movie buff in the midst of a self-created thriller. Contrary to my movie like expectations, there was nothing emerging from the bushes, not even a rat for that matter.

'Is he the sadistic type, who likes watching blood jutting out?’ I thought to myself.
'Or does he derive vicarious pleasure by watching a human writhing in pain?'. Perplexed with such thoughts, I honked once.

No response for ten minutes started bothering me, and why shouldn't it? He had still not paid the 200 rupees fare for my services!!

'Has he run away without paying me? Can't even think of going close and fighting', I thought to myself. Our lanky dude has the dreaded machine. With these thoughts in my mind, I decided to wait for some more time. I saw my watch and the ticking time in the dark shadow of the night accentuated the gripping fear in my mind.

Gathering courage, I got out of my beloved cab. I started walking towards the bushes, chanting Hanuman Chaalisa. Like all Indians, my respect for god and godly things had just shot up like a bull-run sensex graph.

'Ae Bhaau', came out of my choking throat.
No reply added to my chaos.
This time with a demanding twang came, 'Apne ko jaane ka hai, paise de aur kalti len de yaar'.

Expectedly, no response came but I stood my ground. I had put up a brave front for long by still standing at least 10 feet away from the bushes!! Yep, 10 feet. Coz I was just too scared to be there.

200 rupees? How can anyone risk it out for 200? This is what one might feel about this, but, that was the only pot of gold, I had to show to my taxi owner. The anti-valentine's day protest by the 'Live Sena' had ensured no business. And the continuous cruising in the by lanes, hunting for business had got the tank almost dry.
Moreover, it was well past the time I fill myself with some fuel for high spirits.

With clenched fists and a vigorous chant of the holy hymn, I inched closer to the bushy spot.
And then, there was light!!! One beam followed another and the spot was alive to be seen.

I turned back and saw a mobile van with a satellite receiver and men with a video camera, wires, etc. Out of nowhere, a microphone speaker was forced close to my face and a visibly excited bearded man asked me, ‘ Kaisa lag raha aapko, iss cold blooded murder ke baad’.

Well, cold was the night for me and murder was the waste of my time and money.

Perplexed with the volatile change of events, I could not speak and tried to force my way out of the spotlight.

'Khaali-phokat phans gaya re', I murmured to myself and started crying. Thoughts of a trial and the jail shook me deep within with horror. I was barely able to hold myself together, when came out the pugnacious ranting of the bearded man.

'Jee haan, yahan highway no. teen ke pass hua ek cold blooded murder. Aur aap dekh sakte hain live and exclusive, is khooni haadse ke chasmdeet gavaah, taxi driver Albert pe kya beeti hai. Apni bhavnao pe kaaboo na karte hue, woh ro baithe. Hum unse baat karenge aur do minton ke antaraal ke baad hum aapko pesh karenge Albert ka aankhon dekha haal. To Pee News ke saath bane rahein aur intezaar karein DANDANEE ka.'

There was a sudden rush of blood in me and I looked up.
I ran up to the presenter and said, ' Thank you, bhaau'.

He took me to the cab and asked what exactly happened. After I gave the full account, he explained to me what he has in mind, and told me to speak the given lines properly.

'Aur dhyaan rahe, tu TV pe live aa raha hai', he said.
There was an immediate glow on my face with the feeling of being on TV.

And, out of nowhere, I was ready to be a live Albert
'Kaisa lag raha aapko, Albert?', asked the presenter.
'Bole to, apun full shock mein hai’, I said with a stutter, as directed.
And then I answered the presenter's questions one by one.

He closed the shoot by promising the audience to uncover the murder mystery.
He had got the content for some 4-5 episodes and I had got out of a possible mess.

He came to me asking for a light. While smoking I asked him, 'bhaau aap mere pe doubt kyon nahin giraaya?'.
With a grin he said, ' tu koi bada aadmi nahin, naahi underworld ka hai, to public ka interest nahin rahega.'
I got the message. I asked him one more question, ' aap woh dhuan, khopdi, maala bila ke baare mein bolne ko kyun bola?'.
He looked at me visibly irritated and said, ' agla 2 episode dekh, samajh mein aa jaaega, aur apne aajoo-baajoo sabhi ko dekhne bol'.
‘Achcha, ek aur sawaal bhaau, aapko yahan aane ka kaise soojha?, I asked again.
‘Sawaal bahaut poochta tu, yeh jungle-jhaar ke ulte side tantric ka shoot kar rahe the.. Gun ka aawaz suna , aura aa gaya,’ came a quick response.

I understood a little and left a lot for the episodes to come.

I got back to my cab and started driving back on the highway no. teen.
Now there was a philosophical smile on my face and I gave myself a pat on the back.
For what? Well actually for coming live. Something which noone from my area of Bharaavi had ever thought of. To top it all, I have a murder mystery to tell people all my life.

Suddenly, I thought of something which I completely missed.
A dead body, a gun, blood, etc. Amidst the live events, I missed everything associated with this great murder mystery of mine.
For the first time guilt gripped me and I thought of my hero and the dead.

8 days later, I switched on the TV to see DANDANEE.
I saw myself, the presenter, the bushes and the trees... I saw everything but the dead body, or the gun or blood.
Yet again came the bearded man vociferously linking the spot and my experience to the mysterious tantrik accused of gory acts.
I was zapped and left with my jaw wide open.
I could not see anything. I found it hard keep my attention held to theTV.
But, I saw something that will be with me all my life, with a whole new meaning.

Yes, just below the pee news logo, I saw a LIVE.

SELF Kunfused!!!

“Hey, it’s over!” exclaimed the futuristic worrisome ME.

Retorting in a dismissing fashion, "I" said its just a phase and you will miss this also 4 years hence.
Mumbling to self, ME said, "It’s just those self-help books read during MBA days, that’s talking. It’s real and its gone forever."
I said, " Yes, it’s the same feeling you had 10 years back. You just like to lament over past under the garb of NOSTALGIA. Get over yourself and embrace the next."
Irritated at the discourse, ME said, "No, I can't. That's the way I am. How many times will I have to leave permanent and move towards the Uncertainty? "

"Didn't you do that when you left your home?" asked I." And what is this absurdity - I can't change."

“Please leave me alone, we can't talk the same.”, said ME with slight exasperation.

"No, we have to stay together and we just can't think apart. It’s been tearing SELF into 2 directions. He is at a stage where he needs uniformity in thinking and more so a modern and out looking one." a more serious I said.

“You and the whole world always blame me for my outlook.”, ME said getting a little sad.

Like all quarrels need time out, this one too followed the timeless suit.

However, then the day shifted its spotlight on the subject matter of this argument. Yes, introducing the kunfused SELF. His confusion is so bizarre, that my English spellings got confused with German.

SELF is a just an ordinary mere mortal, vulnerable to external influences, not to discount the internal ones from ME & I. He is a young gun, with lots in store from the laboratory of LIFE. Lots simply pertain to the highly predictable events meant to make everyone around him happy. Brimming with ideas about his work, national politics, nation's development, the Indian attitude, et al, he comes across to most as a passionate and aggressive guy. He has opinions and views, and this is where it all boils to his Kunfusion.

Let’s talk about this aspect to be better placed for the 440 volt drama between ME & I.

Is sex before marriage OK? Please do not get perturbed. I'm not going to start a discourse on morality, also not engaging people cutting across diverse sections and have a bellicose debate.

His Kunfusion is quite similar to the highly commercial televised public debates. The only element lacking is a "Over the top, off the seat Journalist" trying to play referee. These debates never come to a conclusive end. So does this question, which never finds a conclusive answer. An answer that makes him confident of his actions, his words and the style he wants to throw.

Now that question which never finds an answer in SELF. I am just using this question as a sample to give you a taste of the kind of confusion that exists.

He has one foot in his past and another in future. He wants to take one route, but finds it difficult to leave past one. Pickled in the past, he thinks his "cut above the rest thinking & attitude" is because of his past. On the other hand, for his current coterie and public image, the future seems to be a more lucrative option. Future is liberation for him as an individual, a license to do things which he firmly believes in. Nostalgia element plays havoc in this as it pulls his other foot back.

SELF is at a standpoint, which many call "the quarter life crisis". I beg to differ, its just a Kunfusion.

Hey! Now do not allow the emotional glands to secret more and more of sentimental juices and have pity on his dude.

SELF is no helpless guy needing buckets of tears from others to make him at ease.
SELF is a human and like all humans need to make choices, he too does.

It’s true for all of us. Isn't it? Our choices give shape to our lives.
And in this process, one leaves some and gets some. No one can say that he/she has not left anything. Everyone has. And for the more practical souls, they do not mull too much for gaining new at the cost of losing old.

OK, here come the duo ...

"Have you made up your mind ?" Asked I in a "I have won" smile.

"Why? Rather who are you to ask me that. Yes, I have made up mind." replied a resolute ME with a "gave it back" attitude.

"Just say Yes or NO, that, will you change?", asked I, getting irritated.

"NO! NO! NO! How many times would you like to hear?" retorted ME, with a raised voice.

"Good for you, you conservative egotist. Just don't like to appreciate change. Live and die in the slum of your ego and rot." , An exasperated I said.

"Now don't push me to the wall. I will bloody kill you." , shouted ME.

"Stop it! Just Stop it! Ridiculous! You guys are killing me", came a moist, but raised voice.

You've guessed it right. Its SELF coming to the stage.

"Enough is enough. And stop fighting.” , came a thunderous statement fro SELF.

"A decision has to be made, but not by a cock fight. I appreciate your concerns of not letting go the past. We wont do that. All I want is appreciating and accepting a few things, that we have never seen or had reservations on.", said SELF.

"Precisely, Bang On, That's what I've been yelling my lungs out on.”, replied a rather serious I.

"When am I saying NO to anything new? All I want is that there are few things which should remain the same. “, a rather politically correct reply from ME.

It’s pretty clear that ME will budge from his position, because for him, change is temporary.
He knows any change will only be suppressing and not subverting it.

I agree with ME, that a person's basic nature cannot change. If those elements are not showing, it means that they are in hibernation. They will come to fore, definitely.

But future has to be welcomed with both hands and different from "YOU" needs to be accepted, how high & cut above the rest attitude one may have.

We do face these testing situations and all we need to do is o face it.

SELF will also face it, face the War Within!

I leave it to your imagination, as to what happened in the 440 volts drama in the end.

Happy Getting Kunfused in Life !